Is matrimony a bliss?
Traditional Marriage is bonding between two sex(male and female) and the Modern understanding emphasizes the legitimacy of the sexual relationships. However the eternal truth that remains is the creation of affinal ties [Read in-laws].
Science of Anthropology would encourage to societies to marry far 'off' to increase the gene-pool but traditionally and culturally close enough to have in-laws one among us or better stated as one of 'our kinds'.
The prennial problem here is: What is the right age to get married? Or is matrimony tie 'the' necessary thing to survive[ read as female survival]??
Is it a moral reposibility of every female to get married? Will she be cursed the rest of her life for not doing so? Should the feeling of matrimony bliss be inherent in every girl? Or we just the agents to reproduce and carry the generation forward?
Gone are those days, when females were dependant on there male counterparts for smallest of the gestures. Monetary and otherwise. Then why marry?
Emotional security? What is that? I dont even understand what it means. There are ways to overcome insecurites. Friends and loved ones can be engaged to into communication to talk our feeling out, would it then require a real husband in flesh and bones to secure us?
Can't we lead a normal life with no overheads of moral and social responsibilties? With no restrictions? And nobody to decide the age we get married at? With the independence to choose the 'one' only when we want to?
Science of Anthropology would encourage to societies to marry far 'off' to increase the gene-pool but traditionally and culturally close enough to have in-laws one among us or better stated as one of 'our kinds'.
The prennial problem here is: What is the right age to get married? Or is matrimony tie 'the' necessary thing to survive[ read as female survival]??
Is it a moral reposibility of every female to get married? Will she be cursed the rest of her life for not doing so? Should the feeling of matrimony bliss be inherent in every girl? Or we just the agents to reproduce and carry the generation forward?
Gone are those days, when females were dependant on there male counterparts for smallest of the gestures. Monetary and otherwise. Then why marry?
Emotional security? What is that? I dont even understand what it means. There are ways to overcome insecurites. Friends and loved ones can be engaged to into communication to talk our feeling out, would it then require a real husband in flesh and bones to secure us?
Can't we lead a normal life with no overheads of moral and social responsibilties? With no restrictions? And nobody to decide the age we get married at? With the independence to choose the 'one' only when we want to?
posted by camouflaged9 at 10:59 PM
12 Comments:
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I wish i could answer in affirmative to all those questions u posed towards the end of this entry...but my dear, remaining unmarried especially for a girl is still very much a social taboo in India, and given our social setup would remain so for some time to come...so lets njoi whatever we have (compare it to the environment our moms/grandmoms faced!)..and take life as it comes!
hmmm...tis blog is much better chotu ! albeit a bit too impractical...waise bhi, marriage isnt a moral responsibility its a social responsibilty (considered to be) for human beings.......and not only for women !! could u plz stop tis Feminist theories !!! Isnt this same for guys too ?? You think there is no family pressure for them to get married? Duh...
nice entry,,
..there is somethin'word called "society"
that has decided some rules 4 a person to live in thr...acording to that.marrige is necessary!!
"Can't we lead a normal life with no overheads of moral and social responsibilties? With no restrictions? And nobody to decide the age we get married at? With the independence to choose the 'one' only when we want to?"
True... the aspiration extends to both genders, and for sure there hasn't been a better time than now to live our life with such freedom.
On the first face I guess men are not just trained security guards for women. The society has its own reasons from the past for giving so much importance for marital bonding. But the times have changed, its our world now and if u feel no necessity in gettin married then u r absolutely right. I am on your side in this issue, and some day, when u grow weaker at heart and feel the need of a company u can get into that relation.
Hey !!! Sparks there Again !!!
Well the below god damn "Bytes" are no answer for all questions ... :-) its more of just a sparks again ... LOL !!!
Well marriage is something to do do with Our Souls ... Well Soul is synonymous to "our true inner self, or the Bliss that stays inside us, we often subdue it due to mortal/man made reasons " ... ,
If we feel a need for a partner , someone whom we could scrap / Share all our feelings , happiness , sadness, any damn thing ... Well Nature is always straight ... Men and women Fall in love and get married or Marry and fall in love ... well this again depends on their state of minds ...
I have seen people who have stayed unmarried all their lifetime (Life comes only once :-) ) ... if at their end of life they think that they should have married ... then they would'nt have done justice to their own god damn souls :-) ... is'nt it ?
On the other hand people marry and break up ... due to various reasons ... they might again marry someone/sameone or stay alone for the rest of their lives ... depends on how they want to carry their lives / EGO ...
But i dont think .. End of life ... if we were atleast married once ... we would ever think ... "Oh God Damn !!! why did I ever marry ???" would we ??? !!! ...well i might be wrong here ... but would like to tell this ... we donno what or how we are gonna feel before we die ... Well am i sounding a bit pessimistic here ?? LOL !!!
Financial Security , Jobs , Money , Power , Glamour, being Famous , Property are all like a tea cups ... but the real thing is just tea cups does not serve our purpose ... we need to fill in TEA into it to really get some god damn vitamins ... to keep us up and kicking at times ... well when I say TEA ... I'm just referring it to our LIFE ...
Man is a social animal ... we got some rules which is for our own good ... well some rules might not suit our EGO ... we break them ... say we might feel ... "why to marry ? instead we can stay just like that with our partner/s" ... well its just upto us ... how we wanna be ... again End of life if we think "we should have married atleast once instead of just being with partner/s" Did we did justice to our souls ??? !!!
Talking about "Should women marry if they are independent, Secure ,... I mean if they have tea cups ... ??" cups cant keep u happy for all times to come ... they also need to fill tea and savour it ;-) ...
Well taking about Emotional Securities ... We have So many friends ... family members ... dogs ... cats ... god damn even pets like lizards on walls ... but even they got to live their own god damn lives ... what if all our pet lizards marry ... and are gone into their own eternal bliss ...? would they have time for us ??? !!! :-)
We never know what is beyond us ... What if we are cornered ... what if all the TEA Cups are broken ... what if this ?... what if that ??? !!! ... well its easy to say ... forget the past ... stop thinking about the future ... stay with the current ... and cherish your today and be happy ... well again there are times when we cant do it ... cant find someone whom u can share ur emotions , ur feelings, ur insecurities, YOUR SCRAPS ... he he he LOL !!! thats when we feel like having a life partner ...
Talking about age to get married ... its again state of mind ... some feel like aquiring all the tea cups before they drink tea ... some think they rather enjoy tea whether they have tea cups or not ... we just have to ask our inner selves ... which we normally dont do ... instead we go on supporting our god damn ego ...
We might not get the right partner ... know why this happens ???!!! because every one of us are searching for extrordinary things in our partners ... he/she must be like this , that ... be rich, be glamorous, be a techie , be honest , be devoted , be devoted, be gorgeous/handsome ...etc etc ... do we ever fall in love with something ordinary ...simple .. just in its true self ??? !!! ... ;-) he he he LOL !!!
ok let me god damn stop sparking around now ... my friend is waiting .. he he he .. LOL !!! gotta go and chill out ....
Well u keep sparking as ever ;-) ... we all get to do some inner thinking to do... LOL !!!
God bless yA !!!
Cheers !!!
Sagar.
Has anyone given a thought why such feelings come to young minds only and more so in the young minds of today...(i m not stating this as a fact but m quite sure that this statement stands true for more than 50% of the cases)
Disclaimer before you read on - dont take it to heart,these are personal opinions and all of you have full liberty to disagree.
Read on -
I think such thoughts come to mind because of the many reasons some of which are even evident in the post.
1.Financial security that the fairer sex enjoy these days...thanks to the new economy that brought jobs,the society which no longer takes it a taboo and the families who encourage it.
SO ITS SOCIETY(to a large extent not discounting the competency of the fairer sex completely) FINALLY HELPING THEM.
2.Some souls get overconfident because,for some 'reasons' they are in demand and center of attraction,for short to medium term depending upon the individual. They forget that this period wont last for ever and the time will come when they would realise that there should be someody entirely devoted to her irrespective of age,beauty,ability and other less important reasons.
To realise its importance,all one needs to do is to observe some old couples. I am sure many of such souls will get their answers.
I don't say that society is a supreme authority and whatever they propose is sacrosanct...but one should give enough thought before questioning few of the very basic norms and learnings of society.
a loose cannon flies high...
untouched..unperturbed...
creatin ripples...bargin thru barriers..ragin with anger..bubblin with liberty !!**
but then all cannons..let loose..
have one fate !! a fate that might as well b postponed by th strength that propels it..but a fate that sure is !!...
smaShed !!!
thats exactly wat i make out of a life lived single..
Asking so many questions .. ?
But why u consider women has only reason of insecurity to get marry ...
or why u consider she'll be cursed for not marrying ..
why can't you look at the view that she gets life partner who stands with her... who walks with her...
women can lead a normal life... but not lonely life.. neither men .. they need to be attached to each other...
The factor of age to marry changes with generation with culture with parents and lot of things here in society ..
The age factor is not what a 1 person can decide neither men nor women.. its your destiny .. who knows when u find your loved 1 and when u are carried by him/her... so deciding and discussing exact suitable age for women to get married is of no use..
because its not decided but it happens..
Husband is not person with just flesh and bones... he is the one who is coupled with u ... with the bond of trust .. completing your other incomplete half.
living a life without any overheads of moral and social responsibilities... just first think yourself ... do you deserve it ...
theres one loop hole in the THEORY ... "Friends and loved ones can be engaged to into communication to talk our feeling out," ....
Well dear , friends will be friends onli to an extent + they will have other ties to tend to rather than jus listen to u + as we age the life has more faces to it and friends is a break in the journey of life and not a resting point... secondly i guess a loved ONE will be far better than loved ones - even u`ll find it dificult to handel all ur loved ones...
And about marriage i guess wat decides the RIGHT TIME shuld be- ur mental , physical and emotional growth along with finding THE loved one ....
How much of Anthropology have you read?
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